Blogger Challenge: Day 13

Day 13, Monday: Issue a public apology. This can be as funny or as serious or as creative as you want it to be.

Dear Annie, 

I have to be honest. I have not been the best friend the past two years. Although I have made time for you, and traveled down to Virginia to visit with you ... I have consistently chosen time spent with boys over spending a longer amount of time hanging out with you. I feel guilty sometimes thinking about this. It makes me realize how much time changes things. How much I have changed within the past two years. I am sure I am not the friend you once loved and adored. And for that I am sorry. 

I am sorry for not keeping in touch as much as I should. For lacking patience and empathy when you share with me your frustrations about your counseling internship. For withholding information from you about the men I date ... because I think [and sometimes know] you would not be able to relate. I am sorry for no longer wanting to do sleep overs, or spend long extended weekends in your company. I am sorry for our same old boring routine - go to the mall, window shop, grab food. 

But mostly ... I am sorry for the events of New Year's weekend in January. When you pooped all over my bathroom and did not clean it up. Instead of freaking out ... I should've stopped to make sure that you felt okay. That you were okay. You never did come back to my house after that incident. I also apologize for our last hangout in February. I rushed down to your place only to rush out early to spend time with my guy. That memory still haunts me ... I know you wanted to hang out longer, but I was not interested in that.

Not hearing from you on your birthday ... when I called to wish you a happy birthday ... haunted me the most. To this day I am unsure of whether you were just too busy or if you just choose not to respond. But that's where we last left off. And now I often feel like too much time has passed to pick up the phone or send a text. I wouldn't know what to say. I wouldn't know where to begin. So I wish upon shooting stars that if we are supposed to be lifelong friends ... if we are supposed to remain in one another's lives ... that our paths will cross naturally again.

Because I am trying to reassure myself in all of this that people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. I am not sure what our friendship story holds ... but know that I think about you every day. And I am wishing on a star that you are happy, healthy and killing it in your internship. You deserve that. I want that for you. You are totally capable of achieving that.

So Annie ... this apology is to you. I hope you know that I miss you. That I love you. And that I am sorry for any hurt or pain I have caused you during the past two years as I lost myself, found myself and lost myself again.