Thankful For My Cousins

I am truly thankful for my cousins. We are a close knit family <or so I'd like to think> and I could not imagine growing up without the company, inside jokes and mutual understanding with these crazy fools!

Here's a peak at some family photographs we recently took ... I think they're absolutely fabulous!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

FIVE more things I am Thankful For

In honor of it being the 15th day of November, and recently posting ten things that I am thankful for, here are five MORE things that I am truly thankful for too:

My car. It's an old hoopty, but my Sophie baby <I named her for her gray mousey color> is still full of life. Just recently she started making crazy weird noises. It sounded like a shovel dragging on the ground, underneath my car. I traded vehicles with my dad for an evening, and being the wonderful father and mechanic that he is, he quickly identified that my front break pads were worn out. So he immediately placed a parts order and plans to fix Sophie today! This car is my lifeline. She gets me from point A to point B every day. In fact, she's been supporting my travels and getting me to places safely since 2008. Times are hard monetarily, and I truly do not have money to purchase a new car. So I am prayerful that Sophie will continue to last and grind until I am in a position where I can afford to purchase a new vehicle. Until then, I will treat Sophie like the queen that she is!

Living on my own. It's been a blessing to live on my own for the past two years, in my OWN apartment! There are challenges that have come with this new experience (i.e. trying to balance paying my bills and having a life) but I LOVE my little home. It's my favorite place to retreat to at night. And I love the layout, appliances and decor! God truly had a dream bigger than what I had for myself when he blessed me with this place. The story of how this brand new, never been lived in before, apartment fell into my life is truly a testament of "what God has for you, is for YOU." I praise God everyday for my humble abode. And I am trying to cherish every moment of this living experience and opportunity, because one day I may fall in love again, get married and start a family. If those things come to pass, I will never again be able to enjoy the sacredness of a space/place being entirely yours.

My brother. Tony is one of the coolest kids I know. I admire his passion for soccer and skateboarding. His independence. His individuality. His love of music and all things philosophical. His sense of humor. His lack of rhythm. His compassion for others. His innocence. And his slug like pace at life. Tony is one of a kind and I am so thankful that he is my brother, to tease and joke with, to have deep serious conversations with, and to have my back if I were to ever need it.

Stacy Whipp. She is one of the first people I met when I began my teaching career. In fact, she IS the first person I met at WMES. Over the past four years, she has become one of my dearest girlfriends. She is the older sister that I never had. She's someone who I can always have a good laugh or a good cry with. She listens and understands. She always gives great advice. She is funny and spunky and upbeat. We love to go dancing or drinking or shopping - regardless of the activity, it's always a great time! She's been there fore me during some of my darkest hours throughout my teaching career, always to pick me back up when I didn't think I could last another day in this profession. I am beyond thankful for her and I truly believe God crossed our paths for a reason!

My sister Michelle. We do not always see eye to eye. We often get on one another's nerves. However I am truly grateful for this young lady. She has a great sense of humor - most of the time - and keeps the atmosphere light <sometimes> ha-ha. She has good fashion sense and an impeccable ability for creating art. She puts of with my shenanigans (all of them) and is always cheering me on as I pursue new endeavors in life. It's great to know that one day we will raise our children together, and that no matter what happens, we will always be there for one another. There's no greater gift then a sister having a sister to grow old with.

Thankful Sunday

So I have FAILED at keeping up with these daily giving thanks posts. Teaching and graduate school are keeping me incredibly busy. So I thought I would write ten things I am thankful for <in no particular order> in honor of the past ten days that I HAVE NOT given thanks.

What am I thankful for? 

I am Thankful for ....

My mother. She is truly my best friend and my rock. She is my biggest cheerleader. I feel that she truly gets me when we have conversations. She never judges and always offers support. She allows me to come home three times a week for home cooked meals. She is someone who I could not imagine my life without. And I am beyond grateful that God chose her to be my mother.

Kat Keenan. My best friend from college. I never knew what a best friend was, until I met her. She is my other half. She is the only friend who I have done possibly EVERYTHING there is to do with. Whether it be laying around watching TV all day. Or sneaking into the boy's bathroom during a football game, and getting caught. She is ALWAYS down for a good time and for breaking rules. And I love that she always chooses chicks over dickies. She is the only person who will keep it real with me. Tells me what I do not want to hear when I need to hear it the most. She laughs with me, celebrates my accomplishments and sympathizes when I am down. She encourages me to never settle for less than what I deserve, and is always looking out for my best interest. There will never be another Kat Keenan in my life. For her friendship, I am eternally grateful.

Erica Johnson. My best friend from high school. Just last night we sat in my car, in a parking garage, at 1 AM <in the freezing cold> having a heart to heart. She is one of my only friends who is a Christian. One of my only friends with whom I share a similar personality and mindset. We laugh all night EVERY time we are together. Laugh and laugh and laugh. She is always down for a good time, whether it be bar hopping, eating sushi or staying in to watch a movie. We have both seen each other at our very best, and very worst. We've been there for one another through the good times and the bad. There is something to be said about a friend who truly KNOWS you. Who knows every heartbreak, every job success, every friendship betray. I told Erica just last night that she is "my person." I am beyond grateful for her friendship, and I know without fail that she will be standing next to me when I walk down the isle one day.

Graduate School. The work is sometimes stressful. It's added a whole new dimension to the meaning of time management. But my studies are AWESOME! I am loving EVERY moment of being in graduate school. I forgot how much I loved learning and I can see myself changing, with each new piece of information I learn. There's something so precious about discussing ideas <in relation to leadership and education> with others who come from different backgrounds and have had different experiences in the field of education. I am beginning to look at myself <as a leader> through a different lens, and I am so excited and so incredibly grateful for this! I praise God every week for leading me to this path ... If there was something that I was meant to study and be on fire about, Educational Leadership would be it.

Anne Lee. My first friend in college. One of my truest friends. One of my purest friends. This girl is amazing! I am awed by her selflessness and her gentle encouragement. She is ALWAYS supportive and never judges. Anne is a diamond in the rough. She's the type of friend that doesn't exist anymore in today's society. She is kind, intelligent, passionate and loving. She always gives, gives, gives. She is my only other Christian girlfriend. I love our heart to hearts about Christ and how he is moving in our lives. Anne has too seen me at my very best and my very worst. Yet she has continued to love me and be there for me throughout it all <especially when I wasn't very lovable>. I had always thought that of course she will be at my wedding - and I'll have her read a scripture or a poem or something. However the last year has made me realize, she WILL stand at the alter with me too.

Lazy Weekends. This is my first year not working on the weekends, and let me tell you ... I am beyond grateful for no commitments during the weekend. It has truly been a blessing to wake up every Saturday morning and have nothing specific to do. I've enjoyed sleeping in late, eating a big breakfast, cleaning my apartment, catching up on TV and getting a head start on grad school work. It is so incredibly awesome to wake up and say, "What am I going to do today?" Each week I enter the work place calm and stress free on Monday, because I had a calm and stress free weekend. It's the simple things in life, and this is one that I do not take for granted.

My father. I truly know no greater man. My father has set my expectations high for what I desire in a future mate. My dad is so selfless and so giving. There is nothing he would not do for his family. There truly are no words to describe how incredibly grateful I am for him. Whether it be fixing my car ALL the time for little or no fee. Or helping me move out my old couch and in my new one. For giving me advice all these years <on boyfriends and money>. For all of the jokes and the laughs. For all of the hugs. For always making me feel like I am the only person in the room, when I enter and he sees me for the first time that day. For wanting to be involved in the lives of my sister, brother and I. For giving and loving unconditionally. For taking us on family vacations, like to Disney World. He is a saint and I could not imagine a greater man to call dad.

Christ. I'll admit, I do not go to church regularly or read the bible as much as I should. However I try to talk to God daily and to reflect on his word <via a Joel Osteen daily email haha>. But I'll tell you what. I serve an awesome God! It amazes me time and time again, how he moves in my life and works things out in my favor. How he blesses me again and again, even when I am not very deserving. How he answers my prayers in unexpected ways. How my moments of darkness and despair, when I cry out in the middle of the night, he almost always answers me IMMEDIATELY! I am so grateful that I serve an awesome God. One who loves me flaws and all and has a great plan for my life, one greater than I could every imagine. He is ALWAYS working things out. And I am grateful for God allowing me to go through storms. Although I hate the storm, when I am in the midst of it, I always come out stronger and wiser. God has an incredible plan for my life - and the lives of my loved ones - and I am just thankful that I know him and walk with him. I couldn't imagine not knowing him.

My job. Although my workplace is environment is not one that I enjoy, I am so incredibly grateful for my students and the opportunity to connect with them each and every day. I love that I am making a difference in their lives, and I love watching them blossom and work up to their potential. I have had the opportunity to work with an incredible group of students for the past two years and they are my heart. Each student has taught me something about myself, and has made me love a little deeper. It's a blessing to be able to do what I love so much every day.

My singleness. This may sound crazy, but I am thankful for being single. It was just a few years ago that I went through a terrible break-up which resulted in a debilitating heartbreak. At that dark point in time, I really didn't think that I would make it. I could not see the light at the end of the tunnel, that sunnier days would eventually move back in. I was at such a low point in my life, and didn't know how to get back up on my feet again. But slowly <emphasis on slow> I began to put my life back together piece by piece, and raise up out of the ashes. I once cursed single hood. I was miserable and felt that this was the worst possible position to find myself in. But during this period of singularity, I have learned SO much about myself and I have accomplished SO much. As my blog entries often detail, I from time to time find myself down about being "the loneliest number that you ever knew." But when I stop and look back at how far I've come, at who I have become, I cannot help but rejoice! This period of my life has been a great teacher and I know that when the time is right, I will find myself entering into another chapter of life. Until then, I am going to appreciate the joys and freedoms of being single. And I am going to learn from each lesson life is teaching me right now, so that one day I will be able to not only love my self but another as well.

Giving Thanks: Day One & Two

Okay. So remember in October <yes, just last month> when I was inspired to participate in the thirty day blogging challenge? Well ... that challenge was short lived. I think I made it to day nine before I literally stopped participating. WHOOPS! The thing is, life picked up a bit in the areas of teaching and graduate school AND I kind of lost my inspiration for writing. I mean some of those topics just didn't tickle my fancy, so I found writing an entry to match that topic laborious. Oh well! I may return to those entry topics if I ever need ideas for topics to blog about.

What I would like to do instead, now that it is November, is to Give Thanks for Thirty Days. I participated in this challenge last year and it was an awesome experience! The biggest lesson I learned was that, "Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive." When we are thankful in the midst of our troubles, we often may find that those troubles become our blessings.

So let's begin with yesterday. On Friday I was thankful for:

• Pay Day! And having money in my bank account <after over drafting a few times>
• A professional day at work - which meant I could sleep in late and go into work late
• A spontaneous trip to the Leesburg Outlets and for the four new shirts I purchased 
• The company of Randi Lapidus on this little shopping excursion :o) We had a wonderful time and I look forward to traveling home to New York with her in January
• The Rooty Tooty Fresh 'N' Fruity breakfast for dinner that I devoured at IHOP! 
• filling up my gas tank for $30

Today, I am thankful for:

• clean dishes (that were loaded into the dish washer)
• a fresh autumn wood candle that's burning and making my house smell glorious
  -and-
• no plans - it's been nice having a lazy day around my cozy apartment

What are you thankful for today?

Happy Halloween

Growing up in my childhood home, my family NEVER celebrated Halloween. I'd like to think my family is pretty religious and my parents decided that Halloween was not something we would participate in. So every year around 5:00 on Halloween, we would pile into our purple mini van and head down to Chuck E Cheese. A few other families from the neighborhood would join us - they too chose not to celebrate Halloween - and we would dine on pizza and play in the ball pit. We would knock ourselves out playing all of the games in the arcade. Then around 7:00, our families would head around the corner to the Harvest Festival at the county fairground.

A local church hosted this even EVERY Halloween. Members of their congregation put on games, and attendees could go from station to station (or game to game) to have fun! Regardless of whether you won the game or not, they had candy prizes that you could stow away in a little bag they gave you. So families had their children dress up in friendly costumes (i.e. cheerleader or superhero). Many families dressed up in nothing but their street clothes. As a kid, I never felt that I missed out on the trick-or-treat celebrations occurring in my neighborhood, because I STILL had an opportunity to get candy. Additionally, I always looked forward to spending the evening with the Manor and Smith families at Chuck E Cheese.

When I decide to have children of my own, I think I'd like to go about raising them the same :o) I mean, hey! I turned out alright.

Funny enough, however, when I entered college ... I took FULL advantage of Halloween. This Halloween experience was a totally different one. My freshman year, I experienced a WHOLE new world when I dressed up as a "preppy" girl, walked up the hill to a house party and drank the night away.

(freshman year)

Over the course of the next four years, I took each Halloween SERIOUSLY and spent over $100 dollars on each costume. My buddies and I would flock to the Inner Harbor in Baltimore, barely clothed and extremely cold, hoping to see creative costumes and get plastered on the streets. We would wake up the next morning - no clue how we ever made it home - and would laugh at all of the photos taken of us in our get ups the night before. 

(sophonore year)

(junior year)

(senior year)

Once I graduated college, I continued to drive back to Baltimore to participate in post college Halloween costume drinking parties. And I did so EVERY YEAR (the past three years) until this year. 

 

 

This year I ONLY celebrated Halloween with my students at school. Weird right? I spent the weekend before Halloween babysitting, while all of my college buddies were out participating in shenanigans. I spent Halloween last night eating pizza and drinking wine at a friend's house. And this weekend is looking to be a quiet one at home. When did I get SO OLD that I no longer participate in Halloween? 

I had the BEST time being a fully clothed participant in the Halloween parade at school this year though! The teacher I co-teach with and I decided to be Miss Frizzle and The Magic School Bus, and we looked AWESOME! 

I had so much fun seeing the students in their costumes and watching them have fun. I am so grateful for my experiences yesterday in third grade, for my students and for the teacher I am teaching with. Although my Halloween has been rather quiet this year, I hope you all reading this had a great day and/or evening with those that you love! 

And in other news ... Happy FIRST day of November! 

Be Encouraged.

These words gave me hope today. They made me feel encouraged during this rough patch that I am currently going through. I hope these words uplift your spirits too :o)

"Someone once told me to always live for the little things in life. Live for 5am sunrises and 5pm sunsets where you'll see colors in the sky that don't usually belong. Live for road trips and bike rides with music in your ears and the wind in your hair. Live for days when you're surrounded by your favorite people who make you realize that the world is not a cold, harsh place. Live for the little things because they will make you realize that this is what life is about, this is what it means to be alive" ― Anonymous

“We have to start recognizing love as a smile from a stranger on a day you’re feeling like there’s no hope left, and a text on your birthday from your once secret lover because they remembered you somehow, and being able to pay the bills or not and feed yourself or not but regardless know you’re trying and at the end of it all, just being able to take a breath and feel happy for absolutely no reason at all.” — Brianna Wiest,

Appreciate Being Single.

So the thirty-two year old guy, that I fell madly in LIKE with, turned out to be an ASSHOLE. I mean if I were to be honest, I got a funny feeling after our second date. Something just was not clicking and I couldn't figure out what it was. After our third date, when he pulled the ghost act, I couldn't help but feel as though this guy was beginning to remind me of my EX who TOO was the ultimate ASSHOLE.

But in Christina fashion, I kept hoping and believing that things would get better. That things would turn around. I mean, let's be real. I hardly ever fall in like with guys. The fact that this guy was 32, owned his own HOUSE, and taught special education made me swoon with raw emotion. He was tall and handsome. He had swagger for a white boy. He loved listening to old school R&B music. What was there NOT to like? I admired him so much and was drawn to his magnetic personality. The fact that he kept choosing to contact and hang out with me made him seem even more appealing.

But my gut continued to pulse, "NEXT." And after hanging out this past weekend, I've decided that this guy needs to get the BOOT. He did the ultimate ghost act AGAIN after we had made plans to hang out. Claimed he got caught up drinking with the boys. Blamed me for not texting him first to confirm our plans. And poof! Just like that, he fell off the face of the earth. Dejavu? I did this song and dance with my EX for four years too many.

One of my girlfriends said to me the other day, "I think you are attracted to a certain type of guy, and I am starting to believe that the type isn't healthy for you. You give your all and that's what you need to start doubting because you do not deserve to take someone's crap. You deserve the best." 

And after much reflection, I have realized that my friends are all right. I continue to settle for guys who do not value my worth. I once wrote a blog about God's perfect timing ... and I can clearly see that he is at it again. I stumbled across two articles/blogs the past two days that are literally crying out from the mountain tops to me. 

One guy said: "Women have become complacent and allowed men to get away with adhering to the bare minimum. Eventually, [they] will wise up and start asking for the things that they deserve, the things that used to be romantic and expected of men. Until then, men are going to get away with putting in the bare minimum and receiving what we ultimately want anyway." 

In reflection, the above statement is SO TRUE about me! I have allowed the guys I have been interested in the most, get away with doing barely anything. I am always afraid to speak up and ask for what I deserve, which results in my getting upset when I feel like I am being taken advantage of or played for a fool. But news flash ... I hold the cards! And I need to change MY approach to how I date men and who I am selecting for being potential dates. 

The other guy wrote: "As a woman, you have to have the confidence in yourself to know that you deserve someone who is into you. Don’t play the games. There are no games to be played here. It’s very cut and dry. If they’re into you, they’re into you, if they’re not, they did you a great service. If they text you instead of calling you, they don’t want a conversation on the phone.  Don’t play the games with the person. Be honest with yourself to know what you want as a person. Value yourself enough to know – they’re not going to play a texting game with you if they’re into you. At the same time, don’t make it so over-complicated that you scare the guy away. It should be simple. Like dancing."

Again, the above statement is TRUE! I need to be honest with myself and determine what is it that I want in a potential partner? And I need to build my confidence that I deserve someone who is in to me ... not someone who is going to be an ASS and take advantage of me.

I am SO glad that I came across both articles AND that both were written from the perspective of a male. My girlfriends are GREAT however they think like me - a girl. We often romanticize things and try to sugar coat and/or find excuses. The posts written by these two men were honest and real - cut and dry - black and white. And their words were exactly what I needed to hear. 

So in closing, I am ending the chapter of the 32-year-old gentleman boy. And I am going to turn to a fresh page to rewrite the chapter of the 25-year-old single woman. It is time to return to becoming everything that I want for myself, appreciating what I have to offer and setting the standards for what I expect from another person. 

As Daniel Goddard said, "You need to be able to appreciate being single because that is when you will grow the most, and with that growth, you’ll come to know what you’re looking for. Great things will happen to you when you respect yourself and embrace that you are here on this planet to do something wonderful. Find whatever it is that’s wonderful and do it. And with that you will attract someone wonderful."