Words of Inspiration for Today

"Today, get a new perspective. God has given you exactly what you need for the season that you’re in. You have the talent, the friends, the connections, the resources, the experience you need for right now. It doesn’t mean that’s all you’re ever going to have. You may need more next month or next year. When that time comes, God will make sure that you have what you need. Because your trust is in the Lord, you don’t have to worry. You lack no good thing." - Joel Osteen

I needed to hear this ... maybe you do to :o)

My Weekend in Pictures

My weekend was FABULOUS and I hope, if you're reading this, that yours was too! Here's my weekend in review:

FRIDAY

I drove 7 hours round trip to and from Busch Gardens in Willamsburg, VA. It was my first time at this park as an adult and I had a great time overall :o) It was fun to get away with some old friends and enjoy the sunshine and scenery. So many times during that trip, I wanted to give up while driving. It is SO stressful driving 6 people in a min van, going 70 hours per hour and having NO CLUE where you're going. The GPS kept losing signal and giving us the wrong directions. At one point, I seriously thought that we would never make it to our destination. But we got to and from the park in one piece, and I can cross driving more than an hour to an unfamiliar place off of my bucket list! 

SATURDAY

I drove my family down to the Inner Harbor in Baltimore, MD and we celebrated my dad's 54th birthday! We dined and grubbed at Bubba Gumps - which was truly a great time together! We then walked a few blocks to Federal Hill and overlooked the entire city. My dream is to move to Baltimore - before starting a family. I absolutely love it down there and it's always so much fun to return and visit my old stomping grounds! 

SUNDAY

My family and I went up to the Linganore Winery for the Reggae Wine Fest! Mom made potato salad and chicken, and I brought some cheese and crackers. We sat outdoors in beautiful weather and listened to live Reggae music while sipping on bottles of tasty Linganore Wine! I purchased a bottle of their Blackberry wine ... it was mmm mmm good! This was my dad's first time at an event like this, and it was fun to see him thoroughly enjoying himself! 

MONDAY

I purchased a new couch! My adored red love seat is no longer my own - I have generously given it to my Dad for use in the basement family room. Although I am sad to see my beloved red love seat go, I am super excited to enjoy this new couch! It's bigger and it matches the interior of my apartment! I also had my carpets steam cleaned today! You know you're old when a new piece of furniture and cleaned carpets make you happy! 

Here's to a wonderful week :o) 

Single Behavior: Anything you do that is uniquely YOU

I am blessed to have lived alone for about a year and a half now :o) During this time, I have been as SINGLE as they come. I seldom have guys over here, and when I am home - I am often alone, alone, ALONE. Don't get me wrong ... I enjoy the peace and quiet of my own home! But I am pretty sure that there are some things I do <when no one is around> that are uniquely me.

For Example I...

• Often enter my home, at the end of a long day, and strip down to my undies. I then put on my favorite pair of sweatpants and a big old t-shirt to frolic about my house in. These sweatpants are disgustingly old (from my days as a high school field hockey player) however I LOVE them and feel the most at home when I am in them.

• Lie on my red couch for HOURS some nights/days surfing the Internet (and by Internet, I mean pinterest, face book, twitter, blogger and Gmail). The TV is generally always on, but I am not listening to the episode of Real Housewives that I missed last night. I zone out and get lost in cyberspace until I look up and realize I have done NOTHING for the past four hours, and then kick myself for not getting done the laundry list of things I needed to get done.

• I will turn on my iPod nano that's docked on my iPod speakers thingy, and belt out songs that I have literally not heard since college (considering ... that was the LAST time I've probably used my nano). Some songs I will replay 5+ times, just to hear myself sing it again - because one I forgot how much I loved the song and two ... I think I sound amazing singing at the top of my lungs in my favorite sweatpants. 

• I'll go a week without cleaning a thing in my house ... and then have the entire place cleaned top to bottom within twenty minutes before my guests come over :o) 

I am sure there are a million more things that I do ... and I just do not realize that I do them. It'll be interesting to hear from a future mate what it is that I do <and never noticed> when the time comes to move in together haha. In the meantime, I will continue to enjoy my own space, my own place and the crazy things I am able to do behind my closed doors!

#theSW30

Where you are in your life vs. where you thought you would be at this point

If anyone had asked me seven years ago where I would be at this point in my life, I would have told them that I would be a general ed teacher who was happily married (to my ex) with a baby. If I was not married, I figured I would be in a long-term relationship headed for engagement. Ha! Kind of funny looking back at it now. 

But I often marvel at where I am in life NOW, because it's a testament to God's perfect will. He continually shows me that his plans are so great for my life ... greater than I could have ever imagined, and that is powerful. 

I am currently in my fourth year of teaching special education for the top county in my state. This week I finish my FIRST graduate school course, the first achievement of my three year journey towards earning my master's degree. Heck! I am working towards my MASTER'S DEGREE! That truthfully is one dream I never had for myself. I just never thought about it growing up. 

I am blessed to be living on my own for my second year! I am able to pay my bills (rent, electricity, cell phone, cable) AND put groceries in the refrigerator. I am able to put gas in my car and pay my two hefty undergraduate loans each month. But I live on my own! In a brand new apartment with brand new hardwood floors and appliances. That is another dream that I never had for myself. I just NEVER imagined it. God had a plan - and he aligned all necessary things for this opportunity to occur.

I am working two part time jobs for extra cash - to you know, life the extraordinary single life haha. It's a heavy load working three jobs, however I am BLESSED beyond measure to have been given these opportunities. I tutor a young man with autism, and I am fortunate to make under the table cash from seeing him for a n hour once a week. I am a blessing to his family - as they continue to marvel at the progress he is making in school academically :o) I am also a blessing to their nanny - as I am able to provide her with resources to help her young son who is just starting kindergarten. After failed tutoring opportunities, where I was underpaid or overworked ... this is a blessing that I never dreamt of! And it came RIGHT ON TIME as another tutoring gig ended unexpectedly -- and I worried about where my extra cash would come from to help make ends meet. God is Good! 

Then I also recently started working with a second young man with autism, providing social skills therapy for three hours a week. This job opportunity came out of NOWHERE! It came at the same time that I decided that I could no longer work 3 hours on the weekend because it was taking a toll on me emotionally -and- because I needed time to commit to graduate school work. GOD IS GOOD! I never imagined this opportunity or what doors it would open. And let me tell you ... I have a funny feeling that more doors may open as a result of this opportunity - and I am SO excited to see where God is taking me next on this avenue. 

I talk to myself all the time - haha I do when I am driving - in amazement about where I am now! My plans for my life have NOTHING on the plans that God has for me, and has shown me little by little. 

Now, please do not think for one minute that I have the perfect life. I struggle daily. I struggle with loving myself for who I am. I struggle with insecurities. I struggle with sadness and worry. I struggle with letting go and letting God take control over my life ... because let's be real, I WANT TO BE IN CONTROL. I want to know EXACTLY what's going to happen next in my life, and I want to know EXACTLY where I will be two weeks from now. 

But I think that's the beauty of this journey ... and of seeing how God works. He knows control is by ultimate shortcoming. Yet he continues to move in my life and get the last grin saying, "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jer 29:11)

So looking back ... I am so THANKFUL that I worship a God who has a plan that's greater for me than I could have ever imagined. He has led me to new heights in life that I would have never imagined. And it gives me hope and promise <when I am not stressing out over why MY plans are not working> that this is just the beginning! He is just beginning to reveal his perfect plans for my life ... so I need to sit back and stay tuned because in ten more years ... I will be at a point in life that I never would've foresaw where I am sitting now. And that's kind of exciting don't you think? 

theSW30

Five things that are most important to you in a future mate

It's funny looking back and thinking about the qualities I used to desire in a future mate. I recall my eighteen-year-old self thinking a six foot, blonde hair, blue eyed football player WAS the one for me. I remember being on my college campus, and locking eyes with any football player really. Tall, dark and handsome or tall, blonde and handsome ... this was my *type* and I was shallow enough to believe that THAT (a football player or dumb jock with a certain build - 200 or more pounds - and a two diamond stud earrings in the ears) was who I wanted to settle down with.

After experiencing a devastating break up and dating countless WRONG guys for me, I've determined in my adult life that there are specific things that I need in a man or rather seek in a future mate. Although there are certain physical qualities I find attractive, I also recognize that beauty is more than what meets the eye and I need a guy with a beautiful inside <sounds lame right?>.

So here are the FIVE MOST IMPORTANT qualities that I'd like to find in the gentleman I am to marry:

1. Faith. I deeply desire marrying someone who is a Christian. Although I do not attend church regularly, or any church function for that matter, I was raised in the church and my faith is very important to me. I'd like to be with someone with a similar Christian upbringing and who understands the importance of faith. It is my dream to raise my children in the church, and in order to do so, I need to be with someone who is equally yoked and has similar values :o)

2. Intelligence. I find it extremely attractive to talk to educated men. Men who enjoy reading and who are critical thinkers - who love learning and are continually seeking more information. As a nerd myself, I would like to settle with someone who can challenge me intellectually. Who can introduce new ways of thinking to me or expand my knowledge on anything. Someone with whom I too can challenge intellectually. I've dated far too many dumb jocks (it's true) and there's nothing less stimulating than an individual who can ONLY talk about football and video games.

3. Determination. Life is hard. Sometimes it hands you a bag of lemons and a series of setbacks. But you have to fall down six times and get back up seven. I desire a mate who is determined. Who will not let life knock him down to his knees for long. Someone who has dreams and aspirations, and who is determined to see these become realities. Someone who is determined to climb the career ladder, or to make time for their kids and family, who will never give up when times get hard.

4. Family Oriented. I come from a HUGE family. I am talking at least fifteen first aunts and uncles and over thirty cousins. I see at least fifteen of my relatives biweekly. I see my family (mom,dad,sister,brother) at least three times a week. I love spending time with family and I want to raise a large family. I desire a mate who values family too! Who enjoys spending time with relatives (not once a year at Thanksgiving only) and who is interested in having children and raising a family of our own.

5. Sense of Humor. I like to joke and laugh. I like to have fun. I need someone who can make me laugh. Or someone who will laugh when times get hard - who will find a sense of humor and joy in the simple things. Life is too short to be serious all the time - and I'd like for a mate who gets that :o)

I am not sure if these traits are a little outrageous ... but I do hope to find all of these things in a mate one day :o)

#theSW30

“Every woman has the exact love life she wants”

I am not sure how I feel about the quote, "Every woman has the EXACT love life she wants." In fact, I do not agree with this quote at all. When considering this quote - I think it's important to think about reality but also a woman's hope and dreams as well.

Reality?

I am single. I am 25 years old. I work full-time and go to graduate school part-time. I work two extra part time jobs (in addition to my full-time job). I was in a serious relationship for 3+ years.  It took me 3+ years to grieve the break-up and transition into the life (and reality) I have come to cherish now. I do not trust guys due to past experiences with them. I am afraid to be vulnerable. To allow myself to let someone else in. I do not want my heart broken again unnecessarily. The reality of my life suggests that I am a cynical workaholic who wants to be single and left alone.

My Hopes and Dreams?

To fall in love again. With someone who I can trust. To find a man who is attracted to my personality, heart and mind FIRST, before he finds my looks attractive. To find someone who enjoys nature and being outdoors as much as I do. To find someone who loves to watch football. To find someone who loves to laugh and have a good time. To find someone who wants to DO things ... not stay at home all the time. To find someone who likes to go on new adventures and to travel to places never seen. Who wants to experience new things and grow together both in mind, heart and spirit. My hopes and dreams represent the LOVE LIFE that I want. I just have not encountered it yet. 

#theSW30

Biggest Misconception About Single Life

The BIGGEST misconception that females seem to have about [my] single life is that I am lonely. My girlfriends in relationships - and sometimes women I do not even [really] know in relationships - frown and say, "Aaaaawwwww..." when they find out that I am single. They immediately ask if I am dating anyone, or on any dating websites, or if I want to meet the friend of their friend's friend's cousin for a blind date.

When dating potentials do not work out, these women frown and say, "Awwwwwwwww..." AGAIN and give me lots of pep talks about things working out, and maybe this guy IS the one and I just have to give it some more time. What these overly caring and sincere [ha] women fail to realize though is ... I am NOT that upset over being single and/or failed dating potentials. Okay ... so maybe once a month I may be a little sulky ... but 99.8% of the time, I could care less.

I am NOT lonely. I get to go home and lay on my couch in my bra and underwear. I can eat a bowl of cereal for dinner. I can watch reruns of Real Housewives of New Jersey. I can curl up  on the right side or spread out in the middle of my bed under my covers. I can not brush my teeth before bed and turn my tunes up really loud when showering, and sing at the top of my lungs. I can go out for drinks with girlfriends at 10pm on a Friday night or hit up the dance floor and show off my cool moves [without feeling guilty about who I am dancing with or what boyfriend I've left at home playing Grand Theft Auto 5].

I am not lonely ... and at times it REALLY bothers me that you INSIST that I may be LONELY.

So enough about my female companions. What about the male mind? What seems to be the BIGGEST misconception that men have about [my] love life? Hmm ... well I'd have to say the NUMBER ONE misconception is that I am interested in a one night stand or hook-up. That I need to *get some* and/or that I really want to *get some* with you. AAAAAH! Wrong answer. I am  NOT looking for a hookup. In fact, I am HIGHLY offended that that is ALL that you thought of in regards to me. I am actually quite content in my current state ... and unless you take the time to get to know ME - my heart, my personality, my intellect - then I have no DESIRE to entertain you or your STUPID misconceptions about me.

What I have learned about being single is that this is the greatest opportunity I may ever have to get to really know myself. To learn what my greatest attributes are and to learn about my most flawed qualities. This is also my time in life to figure out what it is that I am looking for in a man - a husband - a partner for life. Being single and dating allows for me to say: Why yes! That is something that I'd like to find in my future mate or WHY NO! That is NOT what I am looking for in a mate.

So the next time someone insinuates that I am lonely or desperate (for lack of a better word), I want to tell them: You Are Wrong! I am enjoying this journey in life - the ups, the downs and everything else about it. I am grateful for the lessons I am learning about life and myself ... and I am keeping my dream alive that one day ... I may find the one who God has destined for me :o)

On a parting note ... a face book friend of mine posted this link this evening:

How to Find a Real Man: Who He is and Why He’s Worth the Wait

My charge for you - single friend reading this post - is to: 

"Believe that waiting to find someone that will treat you the way you deserve to be treated is better than settling. So press forward with hope.  And there is hope! Just be patient, broaden your horizons, remember the qualities that are most important,  and you will attract the kind of man that will ultimately make you the happiest. It will be worth the wait."

#theSW30