the only person i should have ever been talking to

It's 12:14AM and my eyes are tearing up a little.

For whatever reason I just spent thirty minutes going through your photos. 

It's amazing how someone's past can become so intertwinned with yours. How days pass by and so much changes. But revisiting one picture can take you back to that time and place in an instant. How a song on spotify can transport you back to years ago when this person was a part of your life. 

The greatest blessing I was even given was an opportunity to walk away from you. The greatest gift you gave me was letting me go and closing the door behind you. I can never repay you for that gift. It has afforded me the life that I deserved. The life that I wanted. The life that I needed.

But yet I still tear up. 

I miss our friendship. Well ... what I presumed to be friendship. I am still so confused about that entire experience. That entire relationship. I pray to God that I never entertain anything like that ever again.

I am over us. The past. The fact that this relationship died with the end of the fall season and/or 2017. But I hope you are doing well. Keep living life to the fullest and pursuing your dreams. You deserve all the happiness in the world. You deserve to be in the company of people who understand you and bring out the light in your eyes. And what I just now realized is that that message is really intended for me. That is the only person who I should have ever been talking to.