Where you are in your life vs. where you thought you would be at this point

If anyone had asked me seven years ago where I would be at this point in my life, I would have told them that I would be a general ed teacher who was happily married (to my ex) with a baby. If I was not married, I figured I would be in a long-term relationship headed for engagement. Ha! Kind of funny looking back at it now. 

But I often marvel at where I am in life NOW, because it's a testament to God's perfect will. He continually shows me that his plans are so great for my life ... greater than I could have ever imagined, and that is powerful. 

I am currently in my fourth year of teaching special education for the top county in my state. This week I finish my FIRST graduate school course, the first achievement of my three year journey towards earning my master's degree. Heck! I am working towards my MASTER'S DEGREE! That truthfully is one dream I never had for myself. I just never thought about it growing up. 

I am blessed to be living on my own for my second year! I am able to pay my bills (rent, electricity, cell phone, cable) AND put groceries in the refrigerator. I am able to put gas in my car and pay my two hefty undergraduate loans each month. But I live on my own! In a brand new apartment with brand new hardwood floors and appliances. That is another dream that I never had for myself. I just NEVER imagined it. God had a plan - and he aligned all necessary things for this opportunity to occur.

I am working two part time jobs for extra cash - to you know, life the extraordinary single life haha. It's a heavy load working three jobs, however I am BLESSED beyond measure to have been given these opportunities. I tutor a young man with autism, and I am fortunate to make under the table cash from seeing him for a n hour once a week. I am a blessing to his family - as they continue to marvel at the progress he is making in school academically :o) I am also a blessing to their nanny - as I am able to provide her with resources to help her young son who is just starting kindergarten. After failed tutoring opportunities, where I was underpaid or overworked ... this is a blessing that I never dreamt of! And it came RIGHT ON TIME as another tutoring gig ended unexpectedly -- and I worried about where my extra cash would come from to help make ends meet. God is Good! 

Then I also recently started working with a second young man with autism, providing social skills therapy for three hours a week. This job opportunity came out of NOWHERE! It came at the same time that I decided that I could no longer work 3 hours on the weekend because it was taking a toll on me emotionally -and- because I needed time to commit to graduate school work. GOD IS GOOD! I never imagined this opportunity or what doors it would open. And let me tell you ... I have a funny feeling that more doors may open as a result of this opportunity - and I am SO excited to see where God is taking me next on this avenue. 

I talk to myself all the time - haha I do when I am driving - in amazement about where I am now! My plans for my life have NOTHING on the plans that God has for me, and has shown me little by little. 

Now, please do not think for one minute that I have the perfect life. I struggle daily. I struggle with loving myself for who I am. I struggle with insecurities. I struggle with sadness and worry. I struggle with letting go and letting God take control over my life ... because let's be real, I WANT TO BE IN CONTROL. I want to know EXACTLY what's going to happen next in my life, and I want to know EXACTLY where I will be two weeks from now. 

But I think that's the beauty of this journey ... and of seeing how God works. He knows control is by ultimate shortcoming. Yet he continues to move in my life and get the last grin saying, "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jer 29:11)

So looking back ... I am so THANKFUL that I worship a God who has a plan that's greater for me than I could have ever imagined. He has led me to new heights in life that I would have never imagined. And it gives me hope and promise <when I am not stressing out over why MY plans are not working> that this is just the beginning! He is just beginning to reveal his perfect plans for my life ... so I need to sit back and stay tuned because in ten more years ... I will be at a point in life that I never would've foresaw where I am sitting now. And that's kind of exciting don't you think? 

theSW30